Diary of Saint Maria Faustina
197 O Church of God, you are the best mother, you alone can rear a soul and cause it to grow. Oh, how great is my love and respect for the Church, that best of all mothers!
198 On one occasion the Lord said to me, My daughter, your confidence and love restrain My justice, and I cannot inflict punishment because you hinder Me from doing so. Oh, how great is the power of a soul filled with confidence!
199 When I think of my perpetual vows and Who it is that wants to be joined with me, for hours I become absorbed in the thought of Him. How can this be; You are God and I — I am Your creature. You, the Immortal King and I, a beggar and misery itself! But now all is clear to me; Your grace and Your love, O Lord, will fill the gulf between You, Jesus, and me.
200 O Jesus, how deeply it hurts the soul when it is always trying to be sincere and they accuse it of hypocrisy and behave with mistrust toward it. O Jesus, You also suffered like this to make satisfaction to Your Father.
201 I want to hide myself so that no creature might know my heart. Jesus, You alone know my heart and possess it whole and entire. No one knows our secret. We understand each other mutually with one look. From the moment we came to know each other I have been happy. Your greatness is my fullness. O Jesus, when I am in the last place, lower than the postulants, even the youngest of them, then I feel that I am in my proper place. I did not know that the Lord had put so much happiness in these drab little corners. Now I understand that even in prison there can burst forth from a pure heart the fullness of love for You, O Lord! External things mean nothing to pure love; it cuts through them all. Neither prison doors nor the gates of heaven are strong enough to stop it. It reaches God Himself, and nothing can quench it. It knows no obstacles; it is free like a queen and has free access to all places. Death itself must bow its head before it….
202 My sister [Wanda] came to see me today. When she told me of her plans, I was horror-stricken. How is such a thing possible? Such a beautiful little soul before the Lord, and yet, great darkness had come over her, and she did not know how to help herself. She had a dark view of everything. The good God entrusted her to my care, and for two weeks I was able to work with her. But how many sacrifices this soul cost me is known only to God. For no other soul did I bring so many sacrifices and sufferings and prayers before the throne of God as I did for her soul. I felt that I
203 Now, during this Lent, I often experience the Passion of the Lord Jesus in my own body. I experience deeply in my heart all that Jesus suffered, although no exterior sign betrays these sufferings of mine. Only my confessor knows about them.
204 A short conversation with Mother Directress [Margaret]. When I asked her about some particulars concerning progress in the spiritual life, this holy Mother answered everything with great clarity. She said to me, “If you continue cooperating with God’s grace in this way, Sister, you will be only one step away from close union with God. You understand what I mean by this. This means that your characteristic trait should be faithfulness to the grace of the Lord. God does not lead all souls along such a path.”
205 The Resurrection. Today, during the [Mass of the] Resurrection, I saw the Lord Jesus in the midst of a great light. He approached me and said, Peace be to you, My children, and He lifted up His hand and gave His blessing. The wounds in His hands, feet and side were indelible and shining. When He looked at me with such kindness and love, my whole soul drowned itself in Him. And He said to me, You have taken a great part in My Passion; therefore I now give you a great share in My joy and glory. The whole time of the Resurrection [Mass] seemed like only a minute to me. A wondrous recollection filled my soul and lasted throughout the whole festal season. The kindness of Jesus is so great that I cannot express it.
206 The next day, after Communion, I heard the voice saying, My daughter, look into the abyss of My mercy and give praise and glory to this mercy of Mine. Do it in this way: Gather all sinners from the entire world and immerse them in the abyss of My mercy. I want to give Myself to souls; I yearn for souls, My daughter. On the day of My feast, the Feast of Mercy, you will go through the whole world and bring fainting souls to the spring of My mercy. I shall heal and strengthen them.
207 I prayed today for a soul in agony, who was dying without the Holy Sacraments, although she desired them. But it was already too late. It was a relative of mine, my uncle’s wife. She was a soul pleasing to God. There was no distance between us at that moment.
208 O you small, everyday sacrifices, you are to me like wild flowers which I strew over the feet of my beloved Jesus. I sometimes compare these trifles to the heroic virtues, and that is because their enduring nature demands heroism.
209 In my sufferings, I do not seek help from creatures, but God is everything to me. And yet, it often seems that even the Lord does not hear me. I arm myself with patience and silence, like a dove that does not complain and feels no bitterness when its children are being taken away from it. I want to soar into the very heat of the sun, and I do not want to stop in its vapors. I will not grow weary, because it is on You that I am leaning — O You, my Strength!
210 I fervently beg the Lord to strengthen my faith, so that in my drab, everyday life I will not be guided by human dispositions, but by those of the spirit. Oh, how everything drags man towards the earth! But lively faith maintains the soul in the higher regions and assigns self-love its proper place; that is to say, the lowest one.
211 Once again, a terrible darkness envelops my soul. It seems to me that I am falling prey to illusions. When I went to confession to obtain some light and peace, I did not find these at all. The confessor66 left me with even more doubts than I had before. He said to me, “I cannot discern what power is at work in you, Sister, perhaps it is God and perhaps it is the evil spirit.” When I left the confessional, I started to think about his words. The longer I did so, the deeper my soul sank into darkness. “Jesus, what am I to do?” When Jesus approached me with kindness, I was frightened. “Are you really Jesus?” On the one hand, I am drawn by love and, on the other, by fear. What torture! I cannot describe it!
212 When I went to confession again, I got the answer, “I do not understand you, Sister. It would be better if you did not come to me for confession.” O my God!…I have to do such violence to myself before I say anything about my spiritual life, and here I am getting this answer: “Sister, I do not understand you!”
213 When I left the confessional, a multitude of torments oppressed me. I went before the Blessed Sacrament and said, “Jesus, save me; You see how weak I am!” Then I heard these words, I will give you help during the retreat before the vows. Encouraged by these words, I began to go forward without asking anyone’s advice. But I distrusted myself so much that I made up my mind to put an end to the doubts once and for all. I therefore looked forward with special eagerness to the retreat before perpetual vows. But even for many days before the retreat, I kept on asking God to give light to the priest who would hear my confession, so that he could say, once and for all, either yes or no. And I thought to myself, “I’ll be set at peace once and for all.” But I continued to worry whether anyone would be willing to hear me out concerning all these matters. And yet again, I decided not to think about all this and to put my trust in the Lord. The words that continued to ring in my ears were: “during the retreat.”
214 Everything is now ready. Tomorrow morning we are leaving for Cracow, for the retreat. Today I entered the chapel to thank the Lord for the countless graces He has bestowed on me during these five months. My heart was deeply touched at the thought of so many graces and so much care on the part of the superiors.
215 My daughter, be at peace; I am taking all these matters upon Myself. I will arrange all things with your superiors and with the confessor. Speak to Father Andrasz with the same simplicity and confidence with which you speak to Me.
216 We have come to Cracow today [April 18, 1933]. What a joy it is to find myself again where I took my first steps in the spiritual life! Dear Mother Directress [Mary Joseph] is ever the same, cheerful and full of love of neighbor. I entered the chapel for a moment and joy filled my soul. In a flash I recalled the whole ocean of graces that had been given me as a novice here.
217 And today we gathered together to go for an hour’s visit to the novitiate. The Mother Directress, Mary Joseph, gave us a short talk and outlined the program of the retreat. As she spoke these few words to us, I saw before my eyes all the good things this dear Mother had done for us. I felt in my soul such profound gratitude toward her. My heart grieved at the thought that this was the last time I would be in the novitiate. Now I must battle together with Jesus, work with Jesus, suffer with Jesus; in a word, live and die with Jesus. Mother Directress will no longer be at my heels to teach me here, warn me there, or to admonish, encourage or reproach me. I am so afraid of being on my own. Jesus, do something about this. I will always have a superior, that’s true; but now a person is left more on her own. (102) Cracow, April 21, 1933
+ For the Greater Glory of God.
Scripture
Mark 5:25
25 And there was a woman who had had a flow of blood for twelve years,
26 and who had suffered much under many physicians, and had spent all that she had, and was no better but rather grew worse.
27 She had heard the reports about Jesus, and came up behind him in the crowd and touched his garment.
28 For she said, "If I touch even his garments, I shall be made well."
29 And immediately the hemorrhage ceased; and she felt in her body that she was healed of her disease.
30 And Jesus, perceiving in himself that power had gone forth from him, immediately turned about in the crowd, and said, "Who touched my garments?"
31 And his disciples said to him, "You see the crowd pressing around you, and yet you say, 'Who touched me?' "
32 And he looked around to see who had done it.
33 But the woman, knowing what had been done to her, came in fear and trembling and fell down before him, and told him the whole truth.
34 And he said to her, "Daughter, your faith has made you well; go in peace, and be healed of your disease."
Catechism of the Catholic Church
1503 Christ’s compassion toward the sick and his many healings of every kind of infirmity are a resplendent sign that “God has visited his people” and that the Kingdom of God is close at hand. Jesus has the power not only to heal, but also to forgive sins; he has come to heal the whole man, soul and body; he is the physician the sick have need of. His compassion toward all who suffer goes so far that he identifies himself with them: “I was sick and you visited me.” His preferential love for the sick has not ceased through the centuries to draw the very special attention of Christians toward all those who suffer in body and soul. It is the source of tireless efforts to comfort them.
A sacrament of the sick
1511 The Church believes and confesses that among the seven sacraments there is one especially intended to strengthen those who are being tried by illness, the Anointing of the Sick: This sacred anointing of the sick was instituted by Christ our Lord as a true and proper sacrament of the New Testament. It is alluded to indeed by Mark, but is recommended to the faithful and promulgated by James the apostle and brother of the Lord.
1523 A preparation for the final journey. If the sacrament of anointing of the sick is given to all who suffer from serious illness and infirmity, even more rightly is it given to those at the point of departing this life; so it is also called sacramentum exeuntium (the sacrament of those departing). The Anointing of the Sick completes our conformity to the death and Resurrection of Christ, just as Baptism began it. It completes the holy anointings that mark the whole Christian life: that of Baptism which sealed the new life in us, and that of Confirmation which strengthened us for the combat of this life. This last anointing fortifies the end of our earthly life like a solid rampart for the final struggles before entering the Father’s house.
V. Viaticum, the Last Sacrament of the Christian
1524 In addition to the Anointing of the Sick, the Church offers those who are about to leave this life the Eucharist as viaticum. Communion in the body and blood of Christ, received at this moment of “passing over” to the Father, has a particular significance and importance. It is the seed of eternal life and the power of resurrection, according to the words of the Lord: “He who eats my flesh and drinks my blood has eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day.” The sacrament of Christ once dead and now risen, the Eucharist is here the sacrament of passing over from death to life, from this world to the Father.